Otherwise, one grave would be beautifully maintained, while the others (without care) grow over. It also explains that when a family pays for perpetual care, it typically goes into a fund that then pays for general cemetery upkeep, not just for the upkeep of a specific grave. The International Cemetery, Cremation, and Funeral Directors Association says many cemeteries are no longer able to afford the perpetual care they promised families years ago. "There are several hills here that we can only get in and trim properly by hand with weed wackers," she said. She says the cemetery is maintained, but says days of heavy rain this past Spring, and 200 hilly acres, have made this year a challenge. Marshall explains perpetual care was priced so low in the 1960's and 70's it would be impossible to give individual grave care at that price anymore. You can't really hire anyone to do that at that price," she said. It turns out decades later that perpetual is not the same as eternal.Ĭemetery general manager Terese Marshall said "our perpetual care, back in the day, was $68 a year. It turns out this is common at many older cemeteries, where parents and grandparents signed up for perpetual care 50 years ago or longer. "That's why my Mom got it," she explained, "because it would take care of her graves for the rest of eternity." What really troubled her, though was that her family paid for perpetual care of their graves. "It was pretty upsetting because it was Memorial Day weekend," she said. Generations of Debbie Stehlin's family members, including military veterans, are buried on a peaceful hillside, at Cincinnati's Vine Street Hill Cemetery in Avondale.īut Stehlin was heartbroken when she recently found the grass over a foot tall. But what she learned is a lesson for all of us with aging parents. She says the family paid for care for all eternity, or so she thought. Thinking of paying for "perpetual care" for a loved one who recently passed away? You may first want to hear from a woman who is distressed over the condition of her mom's grave site, which she says is in disrepair, with grass and weeds growing tall all around it.